No. Do not want.

Mar. 27th, 2026 04:42 pm
cupcake_goth: (vampfangs)
[personal profile] cupcake_goth
We took Miss Erzabet No Biting to the vet yesterday; despite her thyroid ear goo, she's lost weight, is still peeing and pooing everywhere, has been throwing up a lot, has been drinking a LOT of water, and has days of sneezing and being listless.

They drew blood, did x-rays, then gave her some fluids, vitamins, and steroids. The vet said that we'll have test results in a few days, but she has lost weight and just looking at her he's pretty sure there's something wrong. On the x-rays her kidneys looked smaller than they should, and her intestines "didn't look right", but he needs the tech to increase the contrast before he can make a diagnosis. 

He used the phrase "be prepared in case of end of life procedures are needed". Not a phrase anyone ever wants to hear, and it sent me straight to my anti-anxiety meds.

For all we know, she'll be put on an additional med and she'll be healthy and happy for years. That's what I'm hoping for. Because while I love(d) all of our kitties, past and present, Miss Erzabet No Biting is the spiritual successor to my beloved Dread Beastie, and I'm not ready for her to leave.

Dear 2026, DO NOT. 

life's little annoyances

Mar. 27th, 2026 06:40 am
sistawendy: me in a Gorey vamp costume looking up (skeptic coy Gorey tilted down)
[personal profile] sistawendy
Annoyance #1: I apparently can't run my induction stove and my microwave at the same time without tripping the 20A circuit breaker that they share. What's weird is, I didn't even notice until it came time to nuke my lunch.

Annoyance #2: The manual that came for my stove is for a different model. I did eventually figure out how to set the clock after I reset the breaker. Yes, the clocks on my microwave, stove, and wall opposite them all tell the correct time because I'm so anal-retentive I can turn coal into diamonds with my butt.

Annoyance #3: This one was kind of a doozy. So, you may recall that my Mom's house finally sold late last summer, and we divvied up the cash. What you pay taxes on is sale price minus fair market value at the time of Mom's death – which is pretty much up to the ever-scrupulous Good Sister to decide – and some kinds of expenses incurred getting the house ready for sale.

Well, I never reported that income, or in this case, small loss. You see, I never got a 1099-S from the title company the way Good Sister did. Neither did Evil Sister, so I'm pretty sure I didn't throw it out by mistake. See "anal-retentive" above.

At GS's urging, I called up the title company in my hometown. They have a 1099-S for Evil Sister on file, but not mine. So now I have an electronic copy of ES's 1099-S so I can file an amended return. Mayyybe I could get an additional refund out of this, but the main point of filing more stuff is to keep the IRS off my back.

Speculation: since my 1099-S appears not to exist, the IRS doesn't know about all of this either, which was why they sent my refund so quickly. I'm sorely tempted to blow this off, but GS is firmly against that. Given that she's a CPA, she's probably right.

Shallow fashion ponderings

Mar. 25th, 2026 12:41 pm
cupcake_goth: (Default)
[personal profile] cupcake_goth
No matter what I do, my hair isn't returning to its previous thickness. I'm loathe to ask my GP for any of the prescriptions that are supposed to help with that because I'm already taking eight prescription meds daily, plus the "as needed" ones, plus around nine or ten OTC supplements, so I don't want to add to that list.

So! I've decided to return to wearing a hat any time I leave the house. I just refurbished my black straw top hat; it now has a large plume of black ostrich feathers, a large antique lace bow with an antique rhinestone buckle, and pink faux roses tucked around the bow. I'm still dithering about if I want to make it even MORE over-the-top by adding a bat chiffon veil that would trail down from the back of the hat. 

I'm also refurbishing all of my wide-brimmed hats, as carrying a parasol while using a cane probably requires more dexterity than I have. Everything is getting more veiling, and I'm dithering about if I need to order a few more crow skull replicas.

---

Thanks to some things rolling across my IG feed, I've learned about the world of Kitchener Style Essences, which supposedly help you learn "where your style and personality blend!" So a more elaborate version of finding your color season. (Good lord, Color Me Beautiful is still going strong. What a flashback to my teens.) 

In October of last year, a "lost" essence was "found"/created: Oneiric. "A softer, more melancholic edge that merges mystery and muted darkness. Something that had never been fully acknowledged, at least not widely." Do you mean: Romantigoth? Doing more reading about it, why yes, they mean Romantigoth. But of course, the people who have latched onto it are quick to say it's not goth. Of course, what a surprise. But it's fun to read about, and is a source for more makeup inspirations.

---

Speaking of makeup, let me direct you to this post on Tumblr, where an absolutely adorable young lady demonstrates how to do a ghostly and haunted makeup look for folks with darker skin. Perfection. 

Nun is cooking in the future!

Mar. 25th, 2026 01:28 pm
sistawendy: me at a house party cradling a taco like a baby (taco madonna)
[personal profile] sistawendy
I pulled the trigger on an induction stove – yeah, after the price went up – and let me tell you, it's super zippy! I can boil water for a good sized cup of tea in thirty-five (35) seconds. I haven't yet used the oven; I hope it doesn't run cool, as the old one seemed to, because I like being able to use the temperatures that I read in recipes.

And why would I do a thing like this?
  • Sticking it to the fossil fuel fuckos.
  • Less planet destruction.
  • Safer! The Wendling in particular Does Not Like having to deal with the open flames of a gas stove.
  • Safer in the long term: better indoor air quality.


It cost well under half of my tax refund. That's what I'm telling myself. I think this will be my home improvement for the year.

What about my gas tankless water heater? I surely burnt a lot more gas with that than my stove every month. Wayell, I'm not in a hurry to do that, but it's worth looking into.

What am I going to do with my (resistive) electric kettle? Well, it has non-boiling settings, so it's good for oolong or green tea, I guess.

Edited to add: No more singeing spaghetti while waiting for it to soften!

goings out

Mar. 22nd, 2026 10:25 am
sistawendy: a butterfly in the style of a street sign (butterfly)
[personal profile] sistawendy
Sushi in my neighborhood with Red. She's a funky yet low key person, and I do enjoy her company. She'd had an intense afternoon at the (Native) veterans' powwow yesterday afternoon, so she declined my offer of a guided tour of lower Fremont. I haven't taken it personally.

But what I do take personally is all the states that are pulling drivers' licenses and making it effectively illegal to be trans in public, or to be trans and work or rent a home. It's isn't just Kansas anymore; Idaho, Oklahoma, and Ohio are following suit. Not that I was ever planning to go to any of those places, but you all know this is literal Nazi shit, right? This information is all courtesy of M at the Mercury, who also told me, for at least the second time, how much the job market has sucked for her, partly also due to being trans.

I tried to catch the last train northbound, but they were messing with things ahead of the line 2 opening next weekend.

(no subject)

Mar. 20th, 2026 12:37 pm
cupcake_goth: (sparklefang)
[personal profile] cupcake_goth

Work yesterday left me incredibly frustrated. The ducks that are nibbling me to death have mutated to giant size and with razor-sharp beaks. Because I was so frustrated, I decided I needed to reread one of the most disturbing sets of Hannibal AU fics I've ever encountered: A Gifted Student and A Letter to My Abuser. They're gorgeously, awfully written. (If you decide to read them, pay close attention to the tags oh god pay close attention to them.)

A Letter to My Abuser is, in some ways, the harder read for me, because when I first read it I tried to figure out why I identified so hard with a side character; Ollie, so giddy to meet his literary idol, but forcibly warned/ran off by this AU version of Will Graham. When I read it last night, my brain went "ohhhhh, yeah, Neil Gaiman", and then I had to read some fluffy fic to scrub my brain. 

I hope his victims get closure. And that they win the legal actions against him, because they deserve the money they're suing for. 

---

EDITED TO ADD: I used to subscribe to FKAHerSweetness' Ko-Fi, as she left Ao3 and only posted her fic behind a paywall. I eventually ended my subscription because as time went on, I didn't enjoy how she wrote Will. She writes AUs only, and more power to her, but they became something I didn't want to read.

shiny drinks, sage advice

Mar. 20th, 2026 06:34 am
sistawendy: a butterfly in the style of a street sign (butterfly)
[personal profile] sistawendy
I went out to the Unicorn last night in my pink & black latex skater dress to celebrate the seemingly delayed arrival of spring. Not much news there, you say, and you're right, but here's the interesting part: I met a (younger, inevitably) trans woman who's had facial feminization surgery, and she had some advice.

First, quarantine a couple of weeks before surgery and mask up. She caught COVID shortly before surgery and had to reschedule. She says she was lucky to get a date just a few months later. I, uh, think I'll take that advice.

Second, cannabis edibles are good for pain management. Honestly, that hadn't occurred to me. I feel like the only person in Seattle who doesn't have a favorite strain. I know the Sculptor forbids weed for several months beforehand, but I'll have to check what he says about post-op weed. If he says nothing, May will be brownie month, because the Sculptor is nothing if not thorough.

Dr. Liu, the good surgeon here in Seattle who has no availability? Did an excellent job on the young lady's face. Yes, she's a cutie, and yes, she has a girlfriend. Le sigh.

in praise of silicone lube

Mar. 18th, 2026 05:30 pm
sistawendy: a butterfly in the style of a street sign (butterfly)
[personal profile] sistawendy
[Does this entry really need a cut? It's not that sexy.]

Some weeks ago, I had an epiphany: neither my dilator* nor my preferred sex toys have any silicone parts**. That means I can use silicone lube without damaging them.

And why would I want to do that? Because silicone lube is super slippery. You need a smaller volume of it that you would non-silicone water-based lube***. And silicone lube is easier to clean off; I use warm water and soap for that****.

Oh, the water-based and silicone lubes that I'm comparing are the same brand: Silk. I got mine at Babeland in Seattle, natch, and I've seen it at other local sex shops.



*A phallic-looking medical device used by trans women who've had sex reassignment surgery like me. Mine is made of polyurethane.
**I have two preferred toys, both designed by yours truly, one made of glass and the other nylon.
***I'm pretty sure silicone lube contains water too, but "water-based" lube doesn't contain silicone.
****Yes, you can put glass toys in the dishwasher if they're borosilicate glass, but I've never bothered because I only run my dishwasher a couple of times a week.
cupcake_goth: (vampfangs)
[personal profile] cupcake_goth
(Thank you FOB/Pete Wentz for always providing entertaining song lyrics.)

Everything is ugh. My back is having one of its stretches of hurting and feeling fragile, so my life involves lidocaine patches and dipping into the stash of muscle relaxers and heavy-duty pain meds. I've been having an upswing in different types of migraines, and I suspect the main culprits are weather and stress. All I want to do is sleep, and my mood can generally be described by that Charles Darwin quote of "I am very poorly today & very stupid & I hate everybody & everything". With a large side of "meh". I really want a doctor to prescribe the historical treatment of going to the seaside for a week (with the appropriate servants to take care of me and bring me dainty treats while I sit with my feet in the ocean).

Today is particularly ugh, as we lost three writers yesterday and I need to cover their work while we hire new writers for those positions. (Yeah, read between the lines there and you can probably guess what happened.) Thankfully, I talked to my boss and asked how this would work with my current projects, and she told me that my number one priority right now is to focus on the writing/being a writer, and once those positions are backfilled, I'll go back to my Program Manager work. So at least I don't have to worry that I'm being held to two sets of different standards. But still, stressful.

Meh. 

---

One thing that's been entertaining me is going through my Tumblr archives - prompted by a post going around asking people how long they've been on Tumblr oh my god 2010 really?! - and finding a lot of fun content and a lot of pink & black eye candy. But I realized (a bit too late) that I shouldn't read my text posts from 2011, because that was the worst year of my life. Dear Powers That Be, that isn't an invitation to go "hold my beer!" and try to overshoot that. I don't need that.



sistawendy: me in a Gorey vamp costume looking up (skeptic coy Gorey tilted down)
[personal profile] sistawendy
I seems that no matter what I do, I can't sleep past 0500 lately, even with the time change. This morning it was some seriously messed-up dreams that did the job at 0445. The good news is that I turned out the light at 2220, so I'm not completely out of it, but still. Fie.

Go big or stay home.

Mar. 15th, 2026 09:32 am
sistawendy: me in a Gorey vamp costume with the back of my hand to my forehead (hand staple forehead)
[personal profile] sistawendy
I got it in my head to go to the Mercury in my Lizzie Borden outfit, the 1890's walking suit in blue velvet that I made, with considerable effort, in around 2002. The trouble is, twenty-four years ago was also about ten pounds ago. I couldn't get the skirt to fit through the waist even with my oldest corset laced as tightly as I could, which probably would have been too tight for a full night out anyway. Sadness.

So did I switch outfits and go out anyway? No. As soon as I got out of the corset my body was all, "Stay home and get some sleep, woman." So I did, and now I'm super perky for doing my Sunday chores.

On the upside, I arranged a second date with Red next weekend. Also, Adrian Tchaikovsky doesn't suck; all credit to the Tickler for recommending him.

And by the way, when I first made Lizzie I didn't have boobs, like, at all. Now I have enough.
sistawendy: me in a Gorey vamp costume looking up (skeptic coy Gorey tilted down)
[personal profile] sistawendy
A few days ago, somebody from Planned Parenthood came to my door asking for money. I'd given before, and since I am, as Good Sister puts it, "a soft touch", I donated. Like, a fair a mount. Since Comfy Lady works there in a fairly senior position, I texted her, natch.

She arranged dinner at Kedai Makan (Yum!) forthwith. That was last night. She reminded me that Trump and his lackeys have prevented Medicare & Medicaid* from buying services from Planned Parenthood, thereby depriving the organization of about 40% of its revenue. I feel better about donating now.

That wasn't the only shitty politics-related thing we talked about, but I wouldn't want to leave the impression that dinner was unpleasant. In fact, look for a locked entry right after the first weekend in April. Comfy Lady should make another appearance, even if minor.

But what's something else that's related to politics**? Global warming. The entire western half of North America has just had its warmest winter on record, but you'd never know that from recent weather in Seattle. It snowed yesterday, just enough to stick for a few hours, and today it sleeted. The sleet started while I was grocery shopping, miles from home, having gotten there on Miss Indigo Bike.

You want to know what sleet sounds like when you're wearing a bike helmet? Plastic popcorn. Bonus: I realized I'd forgotten something after riding maybe a quarter mile through the slush and hail. Yes, I went back and got it, because I needed it. Hey, at least I'm all set for any potential snow tomorrow.



*The US's health insurance schemes for the old and the poor, respectively.
**Everything is. If you don't like that, tough noogies.
mark: A photo of Mark kneeling on top of the Taal Volcano in the Philippines. It was a long hike. (Default)
[staff profile] mark posting in [site community profile] dw_maintenance

Happy Saturday!

I'm going to be doing a little maintenance today. It will likely cause a tiny interruption of service (specifically for www.dreamwidth.org) on the order of 2-3 minutes while some settings propagate. If you're on a journal page, that should still work throughout!

If it doesn't work, the rollback plan is pretty quick, I'm just toggling a setting on how traffic gets to the site. I'll update this post if something goes wrong, but don't anticipate any interruption to be longer than 10 minutes even in a rollback situation.

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